Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope

Lindsay

Mother to Sophia

Born still at 28 weeks on April 3rd, 2010

Central Illinois

In one day your whole world can change. October 12th, 2009, we found out that we were expecting our first child. On April 2nd, 2010, we found out that our precious daughter's heart had stopped beating. In one day we went from a thrilled, exhilarated expecting couple to a couple that had everything swept out from underneath them. In one day, I became a Mother and lost a Daughter.

In the early hours of April 3rd, I delivered our baby girl, Sophia Marie. She was a tiny, beautiful little girl who was the perfect mix of the two of us. My heart swelled and broke in the same instant. I have never, we have never, been through a harder experience in our life.

Our baby girl was the result of 5 in-vitro fertilization treatments. We had been trying for 2 1/2 years and thought we had finally found our happy ending. At 28 weeks and 5 days, that all changed. I had developed pre-eclampsia that caused the demise of my daughter without outwardly showing signs to my Doctor. I became a victim of a condition I had feared for years.

Today, I miss my baby. I miss Sophia with everything I have. She was my, is my, darling little girl who had a whole, full life waiting for her. She had her Daddy wrapped around her tiny finger from day 1. She had me fawning over her every movement. I honestly don't know how I will ever recover from losing my precious little girl. Somehow I need to find peace and I hope it comes to me one day.

Lindsay blogs at http://itisntthateasy.blogspot.com/ 

You can contact her at lindz97@hotmail.com