Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope

Lisa

Three Miscarriages

One Molar Pregnancy

In October of 2002 I found out I was pregnant with my 4th child. It was an unplanned pregnancy and completely caught me off guard. But as I had with my older 3 children, I was willing to welcome this baby to our family. 

 

A month later, I started having some mild bleeding. I went to the ER and they gave me an ultrasound. The doctors said it was still early but they could see a fetal pole and everything matched up date wise. I was sent home to relax. Over the next few weeks I would spot some days and have no bleeding other days. I knew something was wrong. I finally went to my regular OB/GYN. He did another ultrasound. The baby had not developed any since the ultrasound at the ER. I was taken to a back room to receive the news. I knew as soon as the tech started leading to the back of the building I was not going to hear good news. They handed me a phone and I heard the familiar voice of my OB. He told me the baby had stopped growing. He told me to go home and the baby would pass in  a few days. I waited for another week and nothing happened. So I had to have a D & C. I was heart broken. The operation was fast a pretty much painless. I was an emotional wreck for a few more days.

 

That was my first loss. That loss took away that innocence of feeling like everything will be okay during a pregnancy. If that makes sense. Every time I got pregnant after that loss I figured I was just going to lose that baby as well. I have had a total of 3 miscarriages and 1 molor pregnancy.

 

I went on the have 2 healthy children and I am very thankful for that.

 

My loss brought to my attention that some woman cant even get pregnant. I decided to become a surrogate mother. I carried twins for a woman that had her uterus removed because of fibroid tumors. I also had a baby for a woman that had lost 2 sets of twins due to an incomplete cervix.